Are Your Self-Limiting Beliefs Holding You Back from Success?
This is a longer blog post on your self limiting beliefs that are holding you back from success.
5/10/202412 min read
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Are Your Self-Limiting Beliefs Holding You Back from Success?
Nina is a virtual assistant that’s been working at home for two years. She has a steady client load but she’s getting restless. She loves her clients but she also wants to launch her own product line so she can have a source of repeat income and spend more time with her family. She’s done her research and she knows what type of product her community would love.
But Nina starts listening to her critical inner voice. She struggles with thoughts like, “I don’t know where to start. Who would listen to me anyway? I don’t have enough experience to be teaching this yet. I need to take more courses/join more groups/get more coaching first.”
Before she knows it, Nina’s scrapped her entire project. She tells herself that she’s going to master just one more thing before getting started on her product.
A Life You Love Is Waiting For You
You can probably relate to Nina’s struggle. You’re ready to launch your new product or start that podcast but then you hear the same critical inner voice that Nina does.
Imagine having the confidence you need to step into your full potential. Imagine owning your experience and building a business and life that you love. Imagine meeting every obstacle head-on with plenty of confidence to spare.
Become Who You Were Meant to Be
You have the potential to accomplish all of your business goals. But you let self-limiting beliefs hold you back, so you keep playing small. You work with clients that don’t pay you what you’re worth. You don’t publish that book because you think you don’t have enough experience. You don’t partner with a business coach because you think you’re not important enough.
You keep listening to these lies, replaying them like a beloved song. You do this, not because you love being stuck, but because being stuck feels safer than going after what you really want.
Self-sabotage is the playground bully that keeps pushing you around and it’s time that you get angry. It’s time that you stop listening to his taunts and insults. It’s time that you take back your power and become the solopreneur you were meant to be.
You can build a business that you adore, one that nurtures your soul and pays your bills. But first you have to tackle the self-limiting beliefs that are holding you back. Don’t be afraid—your best life is waiting for you on the other side.
Journal Your Thoughts
1. Create a bucket list of 10 things you would like to accomplish within a year.
2. List what could potentially keep you from accomplishing these things.
3. Do any of the reasons you listed in question #2 sound like self-limiting beliefs? What are some ways these beliefs keep you playing small in business and in life?
How to Recognize Self-Limiting Beliefs
Sheila is a work at home bookkeeper. She has plenty of high-paying clients and she loves what she does. But she wants to expand her business and become known as an industry expert. She’d like to start a podcast and she has the first few episodes outlined clearly.
Then she goes online and starts researching how to start a podcast. She gives up on the podcast idea after an hour online because her inner voice reminds her that she’s not good with technology. Sheila doesn’t realize it but she’s just accepted a self-limiting belief.
Self-limiting beliefs are the ones that hold you back from achieving your very best in business and in life. These beliefs are often so ingrained that it takes time to learn how to recognize them. Here are some warning signs that what you’re thinking might actually be self-sabotage in disguise.
Self-Limiting Beliefs Are Negative
Self-limiting beliefs are always negative. It’s the voice in your head that lists all the reasons you won’t succeed. You may think negative comments like, “Who are you to do this? Nobody is interested in what you say. You’re too dumb to succeed. Everyone will laugh behind your back if you try to do this.”
You may not realize this but these negative thoughts are often a defense mechanism. You never have to try if you believe that you’re automatically going to fail and if you don’t try, then you don’t have to risk getting hurt or failing.
Self-Limiting Beliefs Encourage a Poverty Mindset
Often, self-limiting beliefs leave you stuck with a poverty mindset. This goes beyond finances and affects how you live your life and run your business. Your inner voice might say things like, “There’s only so much success to go around. I can’t get ahead in business because my platform is tiny. All of my competitors are driving down the cost of my services so I can’t make a living wage.”
This type of poverty mindset keeps you fiercely guarding what’s “yours”. Not only does this keep you from growing your business, it keeps you from becoming friends with other solopreneurs. You see everyone as a “competitor” rather than a potential business partner or affiliate.
Self-Limiting Beliefs Paint You as a Victim
Self-limiting beliefs make you think you’re a victim. For example, you might think things like, “Success isn’t in my genes. I’m destined to be a loser. It doesn’t matter how hard I work – I still won’t be able to succeed.”
The problem with these thoughts is that they can convince you that you really are powerless. As a result, you don’t challenge your self-limiting beliefs. You stay stuck in the same place for months or even years, never realizing that the real problem was your mindset.
Recognizing self-limiting beliefs does take time. When you find yourself focused on a self-limiting belief, try to counter it with a positive truth. Keep doing this and eventually, you’ll notice a shift in your mindset that will lead to a stronger business and a better life.
Journal Your Thoughts
1. What are some ways that you hold onto a poverty mindset?
2. What are some self-limiting beliefs that leave you feeling like a powerless victim?
3. Negative thoughts are often a defense mechanism. What do you think you’re trying to protect yourself from?
Where Do Self-Limiting Beliefs Come From?
Your mind is like a soundtrack. It constantly plays thoughts as you go through your day. You might have thought things like, “I’m too stupid to do this. My podcast is going to flop. I can’t write compelling copy like other online business owners. I’m not successful enough to attend a seminar.”
If you’ve ever had thoughts like the ones above, then you’ve dealt with self-limiting beliefs. Self-limiting beliefs are the thoughts that hold you back from going after your business goals and prevent you from creating a life you love.
But don’t think you have to give into these thoughts. Your thoughts are under your control. When you take the time to understand how self-limiting beliefs develop, you can gain insight and learn how to change your mental soundtrack.
Unkind Remarks Can Result in Self-Limiting Beliefs
Self-limiting beliefs can stem from unkind remarks from other people. It may have been the teacher that told you that you were a terrible writer, the verbally abusive parent who called you worthless as a child, or a friend who envies your life.
Many people make the mistake of believing that what they’re told about themselves is true. They don’t examine the belief when the words are said. This can cause you to carry around statements about your abilities that simply aren’t true.
Self-Doubt Can Lead to Self-Limiting Beliefs
Everyone is insecure and doubts their own abilities at some point in their life. Maybe you weren’t picked to work on a web design project you really wanted so you assumed that your designs were terrible. Maybe you applied to be a speaker at an upcoming conference and weren’t chosen.
During times of self-doubt, it’s important to remember that other people’s decisions are not a reflection of you. There are many reasons you may have missed out on the opportunity to work on a project or speak at a seminar that have nothing to do with you. Maybe you weren’t meant to work on that project because a better project is waiting for you. Maybe you weren’t chosen to speak because you’d be in an auto accident when you were traveling.
Your Perception of Others Can Cause Self-Limiting Beliefs
Imagine this: you’re at a networking event. You spot another small business owner in the crowd and you walk toward them. Before you can reach them, they turn away. You assume they don’t want to talk to you. You might think things like, “I’m a boring conversationalist. No one’s interested in me. Maybe they can tell I don’t belong.”
Your perception of this person keeps you from reaching out. So you stick to talking just with people you already know and you miss out on the chance to build some great professional relationships.
Learning how to change your mental soundtrack is essential if you want to reach the next level in your business. When you hear self-limiting beliefs, take a moment to consider if they’re really true or if they’re simply lies that you’ve accepted as truth.
Journal Your Thoughts
1. What are 3 self-limiting beliefs from childhood you're holding onto?
2. You can't let go of self-limiting beliefs until you understand where they came from. Take the time to examine each belief. When did you first hear it?
3. Pick one self-limiting belief from question #1. What would happen if you let that belief go?
Overcoming Self-Limiting Beliefs to Grow Your Business
Sarah had spent years working as a web designer. She happily created websites for small business owners and soon, her clients were asking for more than just beautiful websites. They wanted branding advice and they looked to her for answers.
When Sarah first noticed this shift, she was nervous. She didn’t think she had what it took to be a branding expert. But she decided to take a chance and slowly started focusing more on branding. Within a year, Sarah transformed herself from a web designer to a brand consultant, who was making even more money in less time. Her clients loved her new shift and Sarah was happier than before.
You can probably relate to where Sarah was a year ago, stuck between two different paths. To achieve this new level of success, Sarah had to challenge some pretty big beliefs that were standing in her way. She’d been taught that long, hard hours were the only way to become financially successful. She didn’t feel as polished as the other brand consultants she saw.
Like Sarah, you carry around a lot of self-limiting beliefs. These beliefs are preventing you from taking that next step in building your business. Here’s how to tackle self-limiting beliefs and tell them goodbye.
Take Responsibility
Your self- limiting beliefs are acting as a safety net. They’re trying to protect you. But it’s your job to decide whether these thoughts are helping you or keeping from true growth.
Become Aware
Pause and listen to your thoughts throughout the day. Become aware of negative and positive thoughts surrounding you as you work towards your goal. Write these thoughts down.
Acknowledge the Belief
Approach self-limiting beliefs with kindness and follow up with gentle questions. Try to approach your beliefs as if you were talking to a young child. For example, you might say, “I understand that you feel scared of this new direction. But are you really happy where you are or is it just that you feel safe here?”
Use Journaling
It can be helpful to use journaling to get to the root of your belief. Is the belief that you’re struggling with an echo of what others told you or made you feel like at some point in your life? Is the belief out of perspective? What is the worst that can happen?
Reframe the Belief
Self-limiting beliefs don’t have to keep you stuck. You can counter them with positive affirmations that help you move toward your goals. For example, your self-limiting belief might be that you can’t earn above a certain amount. Challenge this belief with affirmations like, “My earning potential is only limited by my choices. I do good work and I deserve to be well compensated for it.”
Remember that you’re in control. You can grow your online business and turn it into a thriving empire when you challenge your self-limiting beliefs.
Journal Your Thoughts
1. Spend a day writing down your thoughts and examine them. Are your thoughts nurturing you and helping you move in a positive direction or are they harming your growth?
2. When you think of life without self-limiting beliefs, what does that look like to you? What would you go after if you knew you couldn't fail?
3. What are three positive things you've been told about yourself or your business? Write these compliments down and add new ones to the list. Eventually, you'll have a long list of encouraging things that other people have said about you.
Stepping Away from Self-Limiting Beliefs and Into Your Potential
When it comes to crushing your self-limiting beliefs, it’s easy to read and think about it. But doing those two things won’t help you let go of self-limiting beliefs. You have to be willing to take action consistently if you really want to live free. Here’s how to get started:
Identify a self-limiting belief.
Choose one self-limiting belief that’s holding you back and that you’d like to change. Once you’ve picked a self-limiting belief, grab a sheet of paper and write down all of the bad things that will happen if you challenge your belief. For example, if you’re afraid to market your services, write that down. Then write down all the bad things that will happen if you try to market your services. Maybe you fear people will laugh at you or that no one needs your services.
Challenge your fears.
Jia Jiang feared rejection, but one day, he decided that he was done. He wasn’t going to listen to his fear anymore. So he set out on a journey that he called 100 Days of Rejection. Each day, he would make a request that he was sure would be rejected. For example, he asked to borrow a hundred dollars from a stranger, dance with a waitress, and sit in a police driver’s car.
These activities might sound silly and they are. But they taught Jia how to overcome his fear of rejection. You can do the same thing and challenge your own fear. Go to a networking event and pitch your services. Reach out to some of your LinkedIn connections to see if they could use a freelancer’s services.
It’s important to do this because you’re re-training your mind about the consequences of your choices. Instead of thinking “rejection is the worst thing ever”, you’ll see that not only can you handle rejection, but that you actually have a lot to offer potential clients.
Enlist the support of a friend.
If you know a solopreneur or small business owner that’s dealing with their own self-limiting beliefs, then it might be a good idea to team up together. Each month, you both pick a belief that you’d like to let go of. Have weekly check-in calls to talk about your progress and setbacks. As you journey together, you’ll learn how to tackle your beliefs and grow your business in exciting, new ways.
Don’t think that you have to overcome all of your self-limiting beliefs in a day or two. It does take time to let go of beliefs you’ve held for so long. Be patient with yourself during the process and keep a positive attitude. You can do this.
Journal Your Thoughts
1. Who could you partner with that might like to work on overcoming their own self-limiting beliefs?
2. What self-limiting belief have you chosen to work on first? What caused this self-limiting belief to develop?
3. What affirmation would counter your self-limiting belief? Write it down on several sticky notes and hang them throughout your home. Add the sentence as an "entire day" appointment to your calendar, like as you would add a birthday so that it will show up on all of your electronic devices. Schedule it for a week to begin with.
Are Your Self-Limiting Beliefs Holding You Back from Success?
Workbook
Self-Limiting Beliefs: Change Your Mindset, Change Your Life
Now, it’s time to dig deep and learn more about yourself. Try to find a quiet place so you can spend some time reflecting on the questions. Share your honest thoughts here – there’s no judgement or right answer. You are free to journal, brainstorm and doodle in this space.
[From: Are Your Self-Limiting Beliefs Holding You Back from Success]
Journal Your Thoughts
1. Create a bucket list of 10 things you would like to accomplish within a year.
2. List what could potentially keep you from accomplishing these things.
3. Do any of the reasons you listed in question #2 sound like self-limiting beliefs? What are some ways these beliefs keep you playing small in business and in life?
[From: How to Recognize Self-Limiting Beliefs]
Journal Your Thoughts
1. What are some ways that you hold onto a poverty mindset?
2. What are some self-limiting beliefs that leave you feeling like a powerless victim?
3. Negative thoughts are often a defense mechanism. What do you think you’re trying to protect yourself from?
[From: Where Do Self-Limiting Beliefs Come From?]
Journal Your Thoughts
1. What are 3 self-limiting beliefs from childhood you're holding onto?
2. You can't let go of self-limiting beliefs until you understand where they came from. Take the time to examine each belief. When did you first hear it?
3. Pick one self-limiting belief from question #1. What would happen if you let that belief go?
[From: Overcoming Self-Limiting Beliefs to Grow Your Business]
Journal Your Thoughts
1. Spend a day writing down your thoughts and examine them. Are your thoughts nurturing you and helping you move in a positive direction or are they harming your growth?
2. When you think of life without self-limiting beliefs, what does that look like to you? What would you go after if you knew you couldn't fail?
3. What are three positive things you've been told about yourself or your business? Write these compliments down and add new ones to the list. Eventually, you'll have a long list of encouraging things that other people have said about you.
[From: Stepping Away from Self-Limiting Beliefs and Into Your Potential]
Journal Your Thoughts
1. Who could you partner with that might like to work on overcoming their own self-limiting beliefs?
2. What self-limiting belief have you chosen to work on first? What caused this self-limiting belief to develop?
3. What affirmation would counter your self-limiting belief? Write it down on several sticky notes and hang them throughout your home. Add the sentence as an "entire day" appointment to your calendar, like as you would add a birthday so that it will show up on all of your electronic devices. Schedule it for a week to begin with.
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